Jailbreak

Apparently, I look gay.

Due to my music magazine press contacts, I received an "exclusive" invite to attend the listening party for Bob Mould's new album, "Body of Song," at a bar in D.C. last night.

Bob, for anyone who doesn't know, was in the seminal band Hüsker Dü and later produced some of the coolest, heaviest albums made during the First Wave of Cool Alternative Music Before Alternative Music Was Popular (FWOCAMBAMWP)® back in the early '90s. Then he came out of the closet, moved to D.C., and became a DJ. Go figure.

Anywho....

I arrived at the bar, a lower Adam's Morgan joint called Duplex Grill, and immediately noticed that the only women in the room were Bob's PR agent and two bartenders. So it turns out that the Duplex Grill is a gay bar. No big deal, I have nothing against gay folks, obviously.

I sidled up to the bar and ordered an $8 Jack and Coke (HOLY SHIT!!!! $8!?!?!?! Now I know why Jenny and I stay home on Fridays...that and the baby, I guess. But I digress.) to kill time while Bob and his homeys set up the private party area.

As I'm sitting there, a couple of other guys there for the press event sit next to me, and when I strike up a conversation, one of them (who was also gay) pipes up with, "Oh, you're here for the Bob thing? I had you pegged as a regular here." When I ask why, he says, "You have the look."

"What's the look?," I ask.

"Oh, you know, the hat, the shaved head, the square, rimless glasses, the cargo shorts." At which point he grabs one of the other patrons to bolster his point. "Doesn't he look gay?"

"You're straight?," the other patron asks me.

"Yep," I reply, showing my wedding ring.

"Well, you look gay."

Okay.

So there you have it, I look gay. I don't know whether to be flattered or what, but it is pretty funny.

To top off the evening, when I asked for directions to the men's room, my new friend gave me some sage advice: "Don't linger in there. You're a new daddy."

The cutest foot ever

Umby has left the body

Well, Sylvia lost her umby (aka umbilical cord stump) today.
I bet life will be more comfy now.

Greedy bastards

It's a tough world for HP. I mean the company is basically floundering with its measly $3.5 BILLION profit, and CEO Mark Hurd is barely getting by with his $1.4 million salary and tiny $2 million signing bonus (oops, I almost forgot his inconsequential $2.75 million "relocation allowance").

In fact, the company is in such dire straits that they are laying off 14,500 workers. Jesus. That's 14,500 families who are now without a job in an area where the median housing prices hover around $760,000. What is wrong with this picture, America?

But that's not all! HP also announced that they are getting rid of those pesky pension plans, too. According to the SF Chronicle, "The company announced that, beginning in January 2006, it will freeze pension and retiree medical-program benefits of HP employees 'who do not meet defined criteria based on age and years of company service.'"

I mean, why not, right? After all, the guys cutting the retirement plans will never need a pension when they're old and grey...they'll probably have some of their $2 million signing bonus left over, I'd guess. Wrong. If Hurd gets layed off, his employment contract guarantees that he would "receive a one-time cash payment equal to 2.5 times Hurd's then-current base salary plus his target bonus amount. Hurd would also benefit from continued health benefits, the vesting of all stock options and partial vesting of restricted stock." That's fair, right?

So why, you might ask, does a company that's well in the black lay off a substantial part of its domestic work force? Why, Joe, why? Well, you see, in addition to Hurd's salary and bonuses, he also receives more than 1,550,000 stock options in the company. When companies lay off workers, the stock price rises temporarily. If the stock goes up just $1 per share, that's another $1,550,000 windfall to Hurd and his buds. Sweet! (If you are Hurd or one of his buds, that is.)

What adds yet another stick into my already crowded craw is the glib way that these family-crushing, greedy, dare I say anti-American corporate clowns celebrate this kind of behavior:

"This was Mark’s coming out party, and he came out with great strength,” said analyst Roger Kay of Endpoint Technologies Associates.“

Well, at least Mark's party went well. Good for you Mark. You prick.

World, meet giant coffee mug. Giant coffee mug, meet world.

This is my giant coffee mug. The Alcatrazilla, as I call it. I don't have time normally during the week to partake of its sweet, voluminous nectar, but during this wonderful time off, we've become closer than ever. I love coffee, and now that I've become accustomed to the six-gallon serving size, I just can't go back to those piddly "normal" mugs.
Do you have a favorite coffee mug? Please let us know about it. And Save the Rock.

More Sylvie Photos

Here's a new batch for you. She's so cute I can't stand it!!!!

Go here to see them....

Indict Karl Rove!

Not only is Karl Rove a slimy, no-good poopoohead, but now it's pretty certain that he's a fricking traitor as well.

It's a federal crime to expose the identity of an active CIA agent. Rove should rot behind bars for doing this.

Of course, the Republican leadership, in their typically disgusting, hypocritical way, are backing Rove by attacking the honest, decent citizens demanding that this traitor be prosecuted. In the words of the worthless Representative Peter T. King from New York, "Republicans should stop holding back and go on the offense: fire enough bullets the other way until the Supreme Court overtakes events."

It shows just how cow-towed the American Public has become when these jerks can be so open about their underhanded tactics: attack, attack, attack, and wait for something else to take over the headlines.

Vacation, all I ever wanted

Taking a little time off to be with mother and baby, which is nice. Sylvie has her first pediatrician appointment today, so we're hoping for a clean bill of health. They are going to put her on a feeding schedule, too, which would be very helpful. Last night she gorged mightily and it all came back up...on me...after a horrible burping accident. Of course, she was unfazed, and hungry again 15 minutes later. Fatherhood at its finest. :-)

More photos!

Well, I've put together a little photo album at Flickr.com to show Sylvia in all her glory.... Thanks a million for all the well wishes we've received from all our fantastic friends and family!

Check out more Sylvia photos here.

IT'S A GIRL!!!!!!!!

Sylvia Ida was born on July 3, 2005 at 3:55 a.m. She weighed 8 lbs, 13 oz. and is 19.5" long! No wonder she was running out of room inside mommy! She and Jenny are both happy and healthy and everyone is happy to be back home now. What an amazing thing! We couldn't be happier...or prouder!

We're waiting.....

Still no news...so we're waiting...

And now for your [easy] listening pleasure....

Thank god! I've finally found an easy, free, way to host some of my music in a streaming format. Now, if you're so inclined, you can go to this site and listen to four of my songs without having to suffer through a forty-hour download.

I will be reverting to the 1960s-era idea of releasing singles one at a time (I've got several in the can now waiting to be posted). As I can only have four songs at a time up on myspace.com, I will cycle through them on a regular basis. I'll announce new releases here on the blog.

BTW, a hearty, and humble, thanks to all those who have given me feedback on Humbucker. It's really fun to be able to create music others can enjoy.

The Power and the Fury

So I went to see Sleater-Kinney at the 9:30 Club on Saturday night. I didn't have a ticket to the sold-out show, so I had to pull a "I need a miracle" style canvassing of the people in line to get into the hall in order to find one (which I eventually did after 25 minutes).

I went to see the guitarists, Corin Tucker and Carrie Brownstein, really, but lo and behold, instead saw the best drumming spectacle I've ever witnessed firsthand.

The band's drummer, Janet Weiss (no, not the Rocky Horror Picture Show heroine), pounds the drums with such visciousness and sheer power that it's hard to believe that she can keep it up for a full 90-minute show. Yet, somehow she does, and then some. We're talking Keith Moon, Dave Grohl, and John Bonham-style bashing here--a crushing wall of sound that propells the music and defies anyone in the audience to ignore her. I was blown away.

And the rhythms were dead-on. Weiss played tight, crisp passages that gave way to wanton destruction and returned back to the groove again and again. I'm telling you, it was amazing. If you get the chance to see this woman play live, do it.

Plus, they covered Danzig's "Mother," which was very cool.

Photorama/Death From Above 1979

Blogger has finally gotten around to letting you upload images directly into your post, thank god. That said, Flickr's system was pretty easy too. But I'm lazy, so I'd rather only go to one site to do one task (blog).

Did you ever notice how most bands suck? Well they do. (Many would say mine does and I do, too, which is their right even though they can kiss my lilly white culu.) Well, here's one band that Does Not Suck: Death From Above 1979. One distorted bass and one drumset, and they really groove. Try it, you'll like it. Hey mikey.

Crimeny, what a hassle!

So sorry to everyone who tried to download the Humbucker files and couldn't yesterday. I've got a ZIP file that I can send anyone who wants it. Or you can use this link to download it (It should work, although it's a big download.)

http://s38.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=0IX3V3H1A42IC0B49ZBQ62J7PG

Just email me a the_lurking_one AT hotmail DOT com, and I'll shoot off a CD to you. Also includes a cool PDF of the album's liner notes.

My new solo album...FINALLY!

humbucker small
Originally uploaded by Xose.

Well, I'm finally ready to release some new music. It's been a long, long while since I've put out an album of my stuff, but I hope this will be the first of a flurry of work from me.

The album is called "Humbucker" and includes 7 of my newest recordings. Here's the track rundown:

Another Bass: Sort of a techno feel, in keeping with the experimental aspects of the album. I wanted something you could dance around the house to.Download

Ballentine: This is the first single off the album. This song originated as a riff I'd been working on for a while but couldn't get any lyrics to fit with. Then one night in our D.C. apartment I was sitting there looking at Hoops and Yoyo and got inspired. Download

Blarney Take 2: This is a cover song about someone slowly turning into a social vampire, originally written by my brilliant friends in the now-defunct Portland band, Lucky. I knew the songwriters, Sean Richardson and Keith Walters, from back in my college days when they were in StrawFyssh, a Charleston, WV band that played with Feast of Stephen on more than one occasion. These guys are amazing songwriters. Download

Gap Soundtrack: I wanted to try my hand at an instrumental that would be good background music for a movie. Download

Jellyfish Eater: The tragic story of a girl, a beach, and a washed-up jelly. The other single off the album, and my favorite song on here. Download

On the Dance Floor: I originally wasn't sold on this song, but Jenny couldn't quit singing it around the house, so I thought I might be on to something. Download

Red Wine and Good News: I love this song. It's sung in an imaginary language. :-) Download

To get to the files and download them, right click on the "Download" link and "Save as" to your HD. I hope you enjoy the record. I had fun making it.

Claws

My big toenails are as sharp as razor blades. Seriously they are deadly weapons. I remarked about them to Jenny tonight:

"My toenails are really sharp."
"I know, you slice my legs to ribbons every night."
"Sorry."
"You should use my file to make them dull."
"But then how would I kill my prey?"

Mom and Dad visit!

We're psyched to have my Mom and Dad in for the Father's Day weekend. Last night we had a cook out of chicken apple sausage and grilled asparagus...yum city!

I'm currently staring down the barrel of three untranscribed interviews for FRETS and Guitar Player that I must get done soon. The band I interviewed last night, Kinski, from Seattle, play some bitchin' instrumental rock and both guitarists were very friendly. Check them out if you get a chance and watch out for the article in an upcoming issue of GP.

Just like old times!

Cookout time!
Originally uploaded by Xose.

This last weekend our dear friends Jane and Sarah came out to visit from Oakland. We were the last stop on their whirlwind East Coast tour, and we're so happy they made it.

Jane used to live in D.C., which meant that we could skip the super tourist stuff and concentrate on the good stuff: Ethiopian food on U St., Yueng Ling Porter and exotic cheese plates, Eastern Market and a quick tour of Jane's and my old houses on Capitol Hill (turns out we lived one block from each other and didn't even realize it back in the '90s) and killer cookouts with our D.C. friends.

We had a blast having them stay with us, and look forward to introducing them to A.P. sometime soon.

We miss you already!!!!!